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AEGIS European Conference on African Studies
11 - 14 July 2007 African Studies Centre, Leiden, The Netherlands
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'Real, fake or no tears at all': Death, Gendered grief and God's will in Fulbe society (North Cameroon)
Panel |
55. Gender and death in Africa
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Paper ID | 714 |
Author(s) |
Santen, José van
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Paper |
No paper submitted
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Abstract | In this paper the author deals with the dissimilar norms to deal with death for both genders in Cameroonian Fulbe (Islamic) society. Considering these norms religious and ethnic rules are as difficult to unravel as a constructed culture and given nature can be disentangled. Though the rule that denies women access to the actual burial of the deceased ones may be Islamic, Fulbe gender norms prescribe women to cry and men to keep a stiff upper lip when upon their first visit to a mourning household. And both genders need to underline that passing away is God's will and that the departing of the beloved one had been foreseen and had been part of this person's destiny all along her or his life: this is expressed with the word 'Doole', 'the necessity' of one's suffering. Women after the tears they shed upon arrival at a place of mourning - as well as men need to control their sorrow, according to the norm of 'pulaaku', the Fulbe cultural system that prescribes people to hide their emotions and is at the origin of a general introvert behaviour. 'Pulaaku' serves as identification for both sexes.
However this screen hides other emotions: thus attending the funeral of a person they do not know that well, women may pretend to cry, while hiding the fact that they don't, while men in a contrarily situation - need to conceal their real tears. Thus not sorrow in itself seems to be a performative gendered act, but religious and ethnic norms of how to deal with it. Or can acts and norms not be disentangled? Do these norms effect the sorrow and result in 'gendered grief'? And if accusations of witchcraft as the cause of death start to be uttered as often is the case - after a person's death, does that mean that witches can interfere with God's will or is it a way to get around acceptance of God's will and 'cope' with death in a different way?
One specific case will be taken as point of departure : a man who first lost his spouse, the mother of his four eldest children; thereafter a baby by a third wife died; than his biological father and mother passed away in the time span of one year; and recently three children from one mother (his second wife) died in a time period of half a year. How did the husband deal with the losses? How did his wives deal with the bereavement of their children? What space was given to the small children to grieve over their mother? How was the head of the household, his father, bewailed. How effective were the words from other people that all these losses were God's will? How did other members of this extended family within the compound deal with these successive losses? How did gender relations come to the fore in the way women and men were allowed to mourn?
In elaborating the argument other cases will be explored. |
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